Life has gone through a rollercoaster ride over the past one year. After lot of heavyhearted days, now things are peaceful. Looking back, it is the First Anniversary of God proving his presence in my life.
A year back, life was at its worst. Unending problems and miseries were creating trauma. We were keen to see the light at the end of the tunnel. All efforts and means to make things straight were in vain. I was slowly losing my faith of recovery. The only thing that was keeping me running was the blind faith and support by a beautiful soul.
Things were taken to a level that once I questioned God about his existence, out of frustration. But he was the only person who could help too. To help myself settle mentally I thought of going on a pilgrimage to Sabarimala, which I normally do, but this time with much more traditional fervor. As per norms to go to that temple one should be following certain rituals for 41 days, which very few follow nowadays. This time I wanted to follow it as much as I could but that too didn’t last long since the problems were piling up like heap of sand and I was getting buried beneath. But deep within I was ensuring that the soul and thoughts are not hampered.
The trip was planned for 19th November 2010. The return would be on 21st November 2010. In between few other temples would also be visited. The cab had 13 members, of which six of them were from our group. We were perfectly paired. Sabari and his cousin Sathish; Mahesh and his college friend Adhavan; and myself and my colleague Siva Kumar made the 6 members of our group.
Though the start was early and we had enough time to visit the temples, people were keen to cut short the journey and skipping the temples. It was me who booked for the journey and there were comments like they thought it was just one-day direct journey. The ironical part of it was that though there were statements like the tradition is lost and none are following things religiously and so on, people were reluctant to do what was expected to be done during such trips.
After reaching Sabarimala we took dip in the Pamba river and started on foot to the temple which is inside the forest about five kilometers from the river. There were only two options; one is by foot and other using dolly. At the foothill, one dolly guy was around Siva Kumar stating it will be very tough for him to make it to the temple on foot so better use dolly. Siva Kumar was hefty but young and was unimpressed with the dolly guys approach. I could see it was mere business strategy of that person and was unhappy in the way they were making their moves. I was also upset that such things are happening even in temples like Sabarimala. Another reason for not opting for dolly was it costs 2200 Rupees.
Siva opted to go by walk. And as any over smart person, without getting to know the truth, I suggested Siva that we will make it together and I got his side back and carried it. On the way he had said that he had complaints of throat pain for past couple of days. The pain popped up again once we started uphill. After about 15 minutes of walk he found it difficult to proceed further as the pain was increasing. At one point, he said he will give up and go back but decided against it since it will have negative impact on the beliefs and his family. Though I tried to energize him with some glucose water, he was not fit enough to walk all the way. And he had to opt for dolly, but decided only one way.
We planned that I will move fast and wait for him at the place where the dolly would drop him. The walk was on for around two hours. The wet terrain due to the heavy rain during the previous days made it a bit challenging. As per plan I was there to reach first and waited for Siva. After around 15 to 20 minutes of waiting he too arrived at the location. We moved ahead and finished with the Dharsan. Immediately after finishing the Dharsan, it started to rain heavily. So we took rest under a shed and waited for the other 11 members to arrive. The rain was at its best and lasted for hours continuously. Siva and myself chatted on general stuffs and he was feeling sleepy too. Then we heard an announcement asking for us by our team members. We followed their instruction and made it to the lodging.
After the night’s rest, we finished with the formalities and started with our way back downhill. Siva took some money from the ATM available there at the Sannidhanam. He was feeling fresh and so opted not to have the dolly. He was much more energetic and active than the rest of us and made it soon to the river down, closely followed by myself, Sabari and his cousin Sathish. We found our vehicle at the parking. After a brief wait for the rest of the group, we started with our journey back to home. We wished each other on having another successful year of making to the temple.
I was tired, as the rest of the group, and was slowly starting to dose off when suddenly Siva woke me up complaining of severe throat pain again. He said both of us would stay back and visit a hospital and let others continue with their journey. I didn’t know why he was saying so for a throat pain as my understanding limited to think of it for acidity. I told about it to my friend Mahesh alias Mahe. He immediately asked the driver to take the vehicle to the nearest hospital. Luckily for us there was ASSISSI Hospital on the way itself just 5 minutes from where Mahe had instructed the driver.
We entered the hospital in a state of emergency as Siva was finding it difficult to sustain with the throat pain. Being Sunday and a hospital in a remote place it was not highly equipped but served the need of the hour. The doctor was a young chap and he told us they would take the ECG. What followed that sent shiver down my spine. The doctor said that Siva had undergone a major heart attack and needs immediate medical attention. I was sweating. I didn’t know what to do. Siva’s family and kids were staring at me in my mind. I was shivering too since this is the first time I am encountering such a situation and I had to make a difference. Being alone at such a critical situation made me worried and weak. I was sweating and feeling giddy. Mahe was with me at that time and I asked him to be with me. His assurance that he will be with me and will take care of things together made me feel better or in fact confident for we’re good friends from school.
Since their hospital was not equipped to serve the situation at the higher level, the doctor quoted Mary Queens Hospital, Kangirapally, which was 17 kilometers away from our current location. Since their main ambulance had gone for some other’s service, they got us their stand-in ambulance, which though was not that well equipped, was well directed by its driver to help us reach Mary Queens Hospital within 20 minutes or so. That was my first journey in an ambulance.
Mahe was with me in the ambulance. We told the rest of the members that we would decide on our further plans once we meet the doctor at Mary Queens Hospital. Siva was given with some basic medicines to help his heart function. In the ambulance, he was supported with oxygen supply. I was holding his hands and every time would look at him to see he is fine. He was mainly staring outside through the window and was relieved to see him normal. At one point I wished that the doctor was wrong and everything is fine with him.
After reaching Mary Queens Hospital, Siva was taken to the ICU. He was given some medicines and was kept under observation. The senior doctor came for check up. I was eagerly expecting a different explanation from him but he too made the same statement. In fact, he added fuel to the fire stating that an emergency surgery is a must and should be taken to Kottayam at the earliest. He said if we had brought him within 6 hours of attack, medicine would have helped but since it seems to be 24 hours since attack, giving medicine will only complicate things. He told Angioplasty is the need of the hour. They suggested taking a special ambulance that had equipments to help any worse case scenario. The doctor suggested two hospitals and we opted for Bharath Hospital. When asked if Siva could be taken to Coimbatore for further treatment, the doctor said it would be like tying a time bomb around the waist and traveling, so don’t even think of it.
Once this was confirmed, we asked the rest of the group to make their move and continue with their journey. We had two main challenges at this time. One, we had to communicate the condition to Siva’s family and ask them to make to Bharath Hospital. Usually I don’t take mobile phone when I am on pilgrimage but luckily Mahe had his post paid mobile connection with him and I asked him to pass the message. He called Siva’s home and said that Siva is having chest pain and we had to take him to hospital, so please try to make it to Kottayam, Bharath Hospital, as soon as possible. I just can’t imagine what would have been their mental state hearing this news. Their cousin who had a car was at his home during that time so they started to Kottayam immediately but it was not going to be easy as it was nearly 8 hours of journey from Coimbatore to Kottayam.
We informed the ambulance service about our requirement and were waiting for them. And here comes our second problem. In total we had only 4000 bucks with us with the bill of the current hospital yet to be paid. Along with that we had Siva’s ATM card that had some 9000 in it. While we were discussing on it, we got a call from the ambulance service stating that the initial 10 kilometers will be charged 2000 Rupees and from thereon 50 Rupees per kilometer. Kottayam was around 50 Kilometer from our current location, which means we should have 4000 bucks for the ambulance alone. And with the remaining very few bucks we should get the surgery done.
After a wait of around 40 to 45 minutes the ambulance arrived. We made our payment at Mary Queens Hospital and started to Kottayam, Bharath Hospital. Being a Sunday was an advantage for us at this point. The traffic was limited but the rain made it a bit tough. Only one person was allowed to sit near the patient. There were two male nurses for help in case of emergency. The ECG machine was running throughout. And every now and then I would look at it. Though I knew nothing about it I was looking at the consistency of the pattern. There was a reading as 120 on the display and every time I would look at it. Siva was fast asleep and I was quick to disturb the nurses to know if it was normal.
After about an hour’s travel we reached Bharath Hospital. Siva was asleep till then but woke up at the last minute, thanks to the last patch of bad road. Here again Siva was immediately taken to the ICU as soon as seeing the letter and prescription handed over by the Mary Queens Hospital. Mahe took care of the initial hospital formalities and I went out in the Ambulance itself to take money from the ATM. Thanks to the ambulance driver and the staffs that they had the heart to drop me back as I was unfamiliar with that place.
After making the payment for the ambulance, I rushed to see where they were. The security personnel guided me to the location. Mahe and myself were met by the doctor and some executive and were explained on the situation. Siva had undergone a major heart attack and there was a block that is stopping the supply for blood to a particular part of the heart. The option left was to do Angiography and find the block and give medicine to open up the block or do Angioplasty and open up the block with stent. There were risks involved with giving medicine as Siva was just 37 and there can be issues of bleeding and also Angioplasty will be needed, if not now but later. They asked us to make the decision.
By then Siva’s family was on the way. In between Siva’s wife had called me and asked to say openly if he had an attack. I didn’t conceal the truth then but didn’t reveal the intensity. That piece of early information helped to get things straight soon and they asked us to go ahead with Angioplasty itself. But now another issue was two different states and no relatives were around to take the responsibility of risk. The hospital was a little worried on those lines. We made the doctor speak to Siva’s wife and since they too were convinced they decided to go ahead with the surgery and they conducted the surgery without even asking a single penny from us. We were in the traditional pilgrimage attire throughout, so were easily noted and people were eager to help us irrespective to religion or place, as they should have been aware that we are there because of emergency. Siva was taken into the operation theater by 7:00 and at around 7:30 the doctor called us and explained the condition and what was done.
Siva had a 100% block in one of the blood vessel in the heart. That was both because of clot as well as fat around the vessel. There were other minor blocks because of clots but it was removed with medicine. This particular block, which was 100% had to be opened by inserting a stent. We were relieved when the doctor said Siva was perfectly okay but needs to be under medical supervision for 48 hours as his blood had a nature that can get clotted. Immediately after getting the news that he is fine, we called his family and passed the message, we didn’t want them to be tensed any longer and wished them to at least be peaceful that Siva is out of danger.
The main positives here were, Siva was brave and never hit the panic button. Secondly, their family members were understanding and didn’t create any confusion. Thirdly, the doctors, nurses, and security were very humble and supportive that we felt saving Siva was their primarily target. Fourth, our friendship (myself and Mahe) and understanding helped to face the situation with courage. And I could see Gods in all those people who helped in getting Siva fine, right from the doctors who treated him to the nurses who supported with the needful, to the ambulance drivers and staffs who helped in reaching destinations safe and timely, to the drivers on the road who responded immediately to the ambulance siren and gave way. At no point throughout this time period we even imagined about any other consequence other than Siva getting fine and I felt it was a strong message from God, to me in particular, not to doubt his existence as he showed it in the different forms.
As we look back, again and again, even the slightest delays or hastening had an implication; else the timing of treatment that followed would not have been a possibility. We would have either been stranded in no man’s land at Sabarimala facing a critical situation or on the travel in search of hospitals. Though it may sound stupid, was the statement by the dolly guy a warning by God for what had awaited us? Only God knows!!! As Steve Jobs mentioned in his Stanford Commencement Speech 2005, you see a clear picture when you join the dots in the reverse, so did I.
It has been one year since we witnessed that fearful day. Siva is healthy and energetic. I wish God to be with him and his family throughout as he had been during that day showing the right way and bringing goodness to that wonderful person and his beautiful family. I also wish God to create more friends like Mahe on this earth and also bless him with peace and prosperity. And finally, I thank God for making me realize him better, deeper and understand him more closely. God is everywhere and if we look closely there is God Everywhere, not by the count that we get from the different religions but by the countless humans where he lives within.
SATHISH N
A year back, life was at its worst. Unending problems and miseries were creating trauma. We were keen to see the light at the end of the tunnel. All efforts and means to make things straight were in vain. I was slowly losing my faith of recovery. The only thing that was keeping me running was the blind faith and support by a beautiful soul.
Things were taken to a level that once I questioned God about his existence, out of frustration. But he was the only person who could help too. To help myself settle mentally I thought of going on a pilgrimage to Sabarimala, which I normally do, but this time with much more traditional fervor. As per norms to go to that temple one should be following certain rituals for 41 days, which very few follow nowadays. This time I wanted to follow it as much as I could but that too didn’t last long since the problems were piling up like heap of sand and I was getting buried beneath. But deep within I was ensuring that the soul and thoughts are not hampered.
The trip was planned for 19th November 2010. The return would be on 21st November 2010. In between few other temples would also be visited. The cab had 13 members, of which six of them were from our group. We were perfectly paired. Sabari and his cousin Sathish; Mahesh and his college friend Adhavan; and myself and my colleague Siva Kumar made the 6 members of our group.
Though the start was early and we had enough time to visit the temples, people were keen to cut short the journey and skipping the temples. It was me who booked for the journey and there were comments like they thought it was just one-day direct journey. The ironical part of it was that though there were statements like the tradition is lost and none are following things religiously and so on, people were reluctant to do what was expected to be done during such trips.
After reaching Sabarimala we took dip in the Pamba river and started on foot to the temple which is inside the forest about five kilometers from the river. There were only two options; one is by foot and other using dolly. At the foothill, one dolly guy was around Siva Kumar stating it will be very tough for him to make it to the temple on foot so better use dolly. Siva Kumar was hefty but young and was unimpressed with the dolly guys approach. I could see it was mere business strategy of that person and was unhappy in the way they were making their moves. I was also upset that such things are happening even in temples like Sabarimala. Another reason for not opting for dolly was it costs 2200 Rupees.
Siva opted to go by walk. And as any over smart person, without getting to know the truth, I suggested Siva that we will make it together and I got his side back and carried it. On the way he had said that he had complaints of throat pain for past couple of days. The pain popped up again once we started uphill. After about 15 minutes of walk he found it difficult to proceed further as the pain was increasing. At one point, he said he will give up and go back but decided against it since it will have negative impact on the beliefs and his family. Though I tried to energize him with some glucose water, he was not fit enough to walk all the way. And he had to opt for dolly, but decided only one way.
We planned that I will move fast and wait for him at the place where the dolly would drop him. The walk was on for around two hours. The wet terrain due to the heavy rain during the previous days made it a bit challenging. As per plan I was there to reach first and waited for Siva. After around 15 to 20 minutes of waiting he too arrived at the location. We moved ahead and finished with the Dharsan. Immediately after finishing the Dharsan, it started to rain heavily. So we took rest under a shed and waited for the other 11 members to arrive. The rain was at its best and lasted for hours continuously. Siva and myself chatted on general stuffs and he was feeling sleepy too. Then we heard an announcement asking for us by our team members. We followed their instruction and made it to the lodging.
After the night’s rest, we finished with the formalities and started with our way back downhill. Siva took some money from the ATM available there at the Sannidhanam. He was feeling fresh and so opted not to have the dolly. He was much more energetic and active than the rest of us and made it soon to the river down, closely followed by myself, Sabari and his cousin Sathish. We found our vehicle at the parking. After a brief wait for the rest of the group, we started with our journey back to home. We wished each other on having another successful year of making to the temple.
I was tired, as the rest of the group, and was slowly starting to dose off when suddenly Siva woke me up complaining of severe throat pain again. He said both of us would stay back and visit a hospital and let others continue with their journey. I didn’t know why he was saying so for a throat pain as my understanding limited to think of it for acidity. I told about it to my friend Mahesh alias Mahe. He immediately asked the driver to take the vehicle to the nearest hospital. Luckily for us there was ASSISSI Hospital on the way itself just 5 minutes from where Mahe had instructed the driver.
We entered the hospital in a state of emergency as Siva was finding it difficult to sustain with the throat pain. Being Sunday and a hospital in a remote place it was not highly equipped but served the need of the hour. The doctor was a young chap and he told us they would take the ECG. What followed that sent shiver down my spine. The doctor said that Siva had undergone a major heart attack and needs immediate medical attention. I was sweating. I didn’t know what to do. Siva’s family and kids were staring at me in my mind. I was shivering too since this is the first time I am encountering such a situation and I had to make a difference. Being alone at such a critical situation made me worried and weak. I was sweating and feeling giddy. Mahe was with me at that time and I asked him to be with me. His assurance that he will be with me and will take care of things together made me feel better or in fact confident for we’re good friends from school.
Since their hospital was not equipped to serve the situation at the higher level, the doctor quoted Mary Queens Hospital, Kangirapally, which was 17 kilometers away from our current location. Since their main ambulance had gone for some other’s service, they got us their stand-in ambulance, which though was not that well equipped, was well directed by its driver to help us reach Mary Queens Hospital within 20 minutes or so. That was my first journey in an ambulance.
Mahe was with me in the ambulance. We told the rest of the members that we would decide on our further plans once we meet the doctor at Mary Queens Hospital. Siva was given with some basic medicines to help his heart function. In the ambulance, he was supported with oxygen supply. I was holding his hands and every time would look at him to see he is fine. He was mainly staring outside through the window and was relieved to see him normal. At one point I wished that the doctor was wrong and everything is fine with him.
After reaching Mary Queens Hospital, Siva was taken to the ICU. He was given some medicines and was kept under observation. The senior doctor came for check up. I was eagerly expecting a different explanation from him but he too made the same statement. In fact, he added fuel to the fire stating that an emergency surgery is a must and should be taken to Kottayam at the earliest. He said if we had brought him within 6 hours of attack, medicine would have helped but since it seems to be 24 hours since attack, giving medicine will only complicate things. He told Angioplasty is the need of the hour. They suggested taking a special ambulance that had equipments to help any worse case scenario. The doctor suggested two hospitals and we opted for Bharath Hospital. When asked if Siva could be taken to Coimbatore for further treatment, the doctor said it would be like tying a time bomb around the waist and traveling, so don’t even think of it.
Once this was confirmed, we asked the rest of the group to make their move and continue with their journey. We had two main challenges at this time. One, we had to communicate the condition to Siva’s family and ask them to make to Bharath Hospital. Usually I don’t take mobile phone when I am on pilgrimage but luckily Mahe had his post paid mobile connection with him and I asked him to pass the message. He called Siva’s home and said that Siva is having chest pain and we had to take him to hospital, so please try to make it to Kottayam, Bharath Hospital, as soon as possible. I just can’t imagine what would have been their mental state hearing this news. Their cousin who had a car was at his home during that time so they started to Kottayam immediately but it was not going to be easy as it was nearly 8 hours of journey from Coimbatore to Kottayam.
We informed the ambulance service about our requirement and were waiting for them. And here comes our second problem. In total we had only 4000 bucks with us with the bill of the current hospital yet to be paid. Along with that we had Siva’s ATM card that had some 9000 in it. While we were discussing on it, we got a call from the ambulance service stating that the initial 10 kilometers will be charged 2000 Rupees and from thereon 50 Rupees per kilometer. Kottayam was around 50 Kilometer from our current location, which means we should have 4000 bucks for the ambulance alone. And with the remaining very few bucks we should get the surgery done.
After a wait of around 40 to 45 minutes the ambulance arrived. We made our payment at Mary Queens Hospital and started to Kottayam, Bharath Hospital. Being a Sunday was an advantage for us at this point. The traffic was limited but the rain made it a bit tough. Only one person was allowed to sit near the patient. There were two male nurses for help in case of emergency. The ECG machine was running throughout. And every now and then I would look at it. Though I knew nothing about it I was looking at the consistency of the pattern. There was a reading as 120 on the display and every time I would look at it. Siva was fast asleep and I was quick to disturb the nurses to know if it was normal.
After about an hour’s travel we reached Bharath Hospital. Siva was asleep till then but woke up at the last minute, thanks to the last patch of bad road. Here again Siva was immediately taken to the ICU as soon as seeing the letter and prescription handed over by the Mary Queens Hospital. Mahe took care of the initial hospital formalities and I went out in the Ambulance itself to take money from the ATM. Thanks to the ambulance driver and the staffs that they had the heart to drop me back as I was unfamiliar with that place.
After making the payment for the ambulance, I rushed to see where they were. The security personnel guided me to the location. Mahe and myself were met by the doctor and some executive and were explained on the situation. Siva had undergone a major heart attack and there was a block that is stopping the supply for blood to a particular part of the heart. The option left was to do Angiography and find the block and give medicine to open up the block or do Angioplasty and open up the block with stent. There were risks involved with giving medicine as Siva was just 37 and there can be issues of bleeding and also Angioplasty will be needed, if not now but later. They asked us to make the decision.
By then Siva’s family was on the way. In between Siva’s wife had called me and asked to say openly if he had an attack. I didn’t conceal the truth then but didn’t reveal the intensity. That piece of early information helped to get things straight soon and they asked us to go ahead with Angioplasty itself. But now another issue was two different states and no relatives were around to take the responsibility of risk. The hospital was a little worried on those lines. We made the doctor speak to Siva’s wife and since they too were convinced they decided to go ahead with the surgery and they conducted the surgery without even asking a single penny from us. We were in the traditional pilgrimage attire throughout, so were easily noted and people were eager to help us irrespective to religion or place, as they should have been aware that we are there because of emergency. Siva was taken into the operation theater by 7:00 and at around 7:30 the doctor called us and explained the condition and what was done.
Siva had a 100% block in one of the blood vessel in the heart. That was both because of clot as well as fat around the vessel. There were other minor blocks because of clots but it was removed with medicine. This particular block, which was 100% had to be opened by inserting a stent. We were relieved when the doctor said Siva was perfectly okay but needs to be under medical supervision for 48 hours as his blood had a nature that can get clotted. Immediately after getting the news that he is fine, we called his family and passed the message, we didn’t want them to be tensed any longer and wished them to at least be peaceful that Siva is out of danger.
The main positives here were, Siva was brave and never hit the panic button. Secondly, their family members were understanding and didn’t create any confusion. Thirdly, the doctors, nurses, and security were very humble and supportive that we felt saving Siva was their primarily target. Fourth, our friendship (myself and Mahe) and understanding helped to face the situation with courage. And I could see Gods in all those people who helped in getting Siva fine, right from the doctors who treated him to the nurses who supported with the needful, to the ambulance drivers and staffs who helped in reaching destinations safe and timely, to the drivers on the road who responded immediately to the ambulance siren and gave way. At no point throughout this time period we even imagined about any other consequence other than Siva getting fine and I felt it was a strong message from God, to me in particular, not to doubt his existence as he showed it in the different forms.
As we look back, again and again, even the slightest delays or hastening had an implication; else the timing of treatment that followed would not have been a possibility. We would have either been stranded in no man’s land at Sabarimala facing a critical situation or on the travel in search of hospitals. Though it may sound stupid, was the statement by the dolly guy a warning by God for what had awaited us? Only God knows!!! As Steve Jobs mentioned in his Stanford Commencement Speech 2005, you see a clear picture when you join the dots in the reverse, so did I.
It has been one year since we witnessed that fearful day. Siva is healthy and energetic. I wish God to be with him and his family throughout as he had been during that day showing the right way and bringing goodness to that wonderful person and his beautiful family. I also wish God to create more friends like Mahe on this earth and also bless him with peace and prosperity. And finally, I thank God for making me realize him better, deeper and understand him more closely. God is everywhere and if we look closely there is God Everywhere, not by the count that we get from the different religions but by the countless humans where he lives within.
SATHISH N
